


tell me how

by brunetteandblond



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Adora (She-Ra) is a Dork, Adora is a Defense Attorney, Alternate Universe - Lawyers, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anxious Adora (She-Ra), Catra Has Issues (She-Ra), Catra is a PI, F/F, F/M, Feeling denial, Flashbacks, God Catra and Adora just love each other, Lesbian Adora (She-Ra), Lesbian Catra (She-Ra), Past Abuse, Slow Burn, They Had a Thing but Alas, catradora, they both have issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:29:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25772119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brunetteandblond/pseuds/brunetteandblond
Summary: Adora's a hardcore workaholic defense attorney fighting to keep innocent people out of prison.Catra's an angst-ridden private investigator trying to make ends meet.Both of them are hell-bent on saving three rookies from prison and taking down the corrupt cops that arrested them.The only problem?Ten years ago Catra and Adora ended whatever they had and they are a little pissed about having to work together again. And for some reason, the attraction that was there ten years ago hasn't subsided. It's a complete mess. They're a mess.
Relationships: Adora & Bow & Glimmer (She-Ra), Adora & Catra (She-Ra), Adora/Catra (She-Ra), Bow/Glimmer (She-Ra), Catra & Entrapta & Scorpia (She-Ra), Perfuma/Scorpia (She-Ra)
Comments: 22
Kudos: 115





	1. i can't call you a stranger

**Author's Note:**

> And so a Catradora multi-chapter fic begins. Please let me know what you think!

Darkness usually beckoned people to sleep, but Adora was different. She always had been. She felt comforted by the fact that when she was awake, the rest of the world was asleep. She liked the silence; the way that no one could seem to bother her at such a late time. Yet somehow, she never felt lonely in the depths of night. The stars had kept her company ever since she was young. Even as an adult she relied on the stars, even when they were barely visible with all the city light. 

Late into the night or morning (Adora couldn’t tell), her eyes burned as she stared at the screen. She wanted to fight against her bodily functions, hating her eyes for having the audacity to feel tired. She had work to do. She always had work to do. 

But Glimmer texted her. Glimmer  _ always  _ texted her right when Adora was getting somewhere in her work. 

**Glimmer: Adora, it’s 1:00, please come home**

Adora did what Adora did best. She ignored the text. Glimmer tended to worry about things that had nothing to do with her, especially when it came to her best friend. Most days, Adora loved that about her. Tonight, she was annoyed. She was so close, she felt it deep in her bones. She was going to find something that would prove the innocence of--

She got another text and groaned. 

**Bow: Glimmer is killing me, Adora! Don’t make me come pick you up!**

_ Fuck.  _ She would have liked to believe that Bow was just kidding, but knowing him, his threats (since he rarely gave threats) were never empty. Bow was the nicest guy in the world, but he was just as stubborn as Adora. If he believed he was doing the right thing, there was nothing anyone could do to stop him. It was what made him a ruthless (and empathetic) lawyer and good friend (albeit, a little frustrating sometimes). 

Murmuring curses to herself, she gathered up all of her shit and texted her friends that she was on her way back to their apartment. She didn’t want to stop working when she was  _ this  _ close, but she also knew she had a habit of passing out when she doesn’t sleep for a few days. It didn’t happen often, but it happened often enough for everyone else besides her to consider it a ‘problem’. 

Her eyes were betraying her as she drove home. It was a short five-minute drive, but the number of times she had to smack herself was frightening. Even with her music up all the way, she almost fell asleep. It wasn’t really a problem, though. She was fine. 

“You look like--” 

“Shit,” Adora answered as she entered the small apartment that she shared with her best friends and colleagues. “I know. I was so close with the Yates case, you know.” 

Glimmer had her hands on her hips and her ‘mom’ face on. “I’m sure you were. Go to bed, Adora.” 

Adora rolled her eyes and tried to remember how much she loved Glimmer on a good day. Glimmer was her first friend at the firm. Glimmer was the first person who gave her a chance. Glimmer was crafty and wicked and brilliant and Adora loved her. But dammit, Glimmer was the ‘mom’ friend and Adora did not appreciate being treated like a child. She didn’t want anyone to take care of her as if she wasn’t capable of taking care of herself. 

“Is Bow sleeping in your--” 

“Go to bed, Adora!” Glimmer (though almost a whole foot shorter) grabbed a hold of her and pushed her toward the direction of Adora’s incredibly tiny room. Usually, Adora was much stronger than her friend with pink tips in her hair, but she barely had any fight left in her. 

She had enough energy to get into the bathroom, but was terrified to look at herself in the mirror. She didn’t have to see herself to know that she probably looked like a mess. She didn’t have to look at the mirror to know that her blue eyes were probably slightly red with dark circles underneath and that her blonde hair had random strands pulled out of her tight ponytail. She brushed her teeth and washed her face. 

Her bed was calling her, practically chanting her name, but when she laid down (with all of her clothes on), she suddenly felt very awake again. She loved the night, but she hated her insomnia. She had always been a bad sleeper, but it had gotten worse over the past few years. She thought that when she got to a point when she was working 24/7 she would be able to fall asleep out of exhaustion, but that hadn’t been the case. She still stared at the ceiling and tried the tricks that Google had suggested. They never worked, but usually, they were enough of a distraction to the other kind of thoughts that usually fragmented her mind at night. 

Adora took a deep breath and exhaled. Sometimes she really wished she would take the melatonin like Glimmer kept telling her to. 

* * *

“Oh my, that’s disgusting.” 

Catra almost completely flinched. She had forgotten that she had brought Scorpia along for the stake-out. Since Scorpia was a talker, the numbing silence must have made her feel like she was still alone. She was used to the woman chatting her ear off about things that Catra didn’t care about. Her not talking for a long amount of time was new for her. 

“What?” Catra just took pictures of the couple in the car. 

“He’s married. He should not be hooking up with someone else. I just don’t understand people. Marriage is a sacred oath.” 

Catra snorted as she took more pictures knowing that she was going to get a big check for this case. This was the first stake-out she had taken her new partner with. She normally hated to do ‘cheating’ cases, but she was hurt for cash and, well, it was an easy cash maker. She had to do the shit so that she could do the work she really wanted to do. 

“Well, if it makes you feel any better, Scorp, the wife is going to get a huge chunk of change in the divorce. She could probably take everything from the dick.” 

Scorpia harrumphed. “Still. She’ll hurt from seeing this.” 

Catra didn’t mind Scorpia most of the time, but the tall woman had more emotions than anyone Catra had ever met before and it made her incredibly uncomfortable sometimes. She liked doing this job untethered to any emotions at all. It was easier. 

“Look.” Catra turned to her new partner and scowled. “The people that pay me already know deep down that their partner’s cheating. I just take the pictures.” 

Scorpia shivered. “I would never cheat. That’s just so cruel, you know?” 

Catra shrugged. She had never been cheated on or cheated on someone, though she guessed that at one point she was probably the ‘other woman’, not that she really cared. Sex was sex. Sometimes she forgot that there were people out there like Scorpia who really believed in love. 

“Good for you. Let’s head back. We have a meeting with the trio.” 

Scorpia nodded, obviously still bothered by what she had just seen. Scorpia was a good investigator, Catra knew this (it’s why she hired her), but she still thought that the woman was naive. Scorpia was the kind of person who believed that good was in everyone. Catra knew that if anything, everyone was capable of bad, but some chose not to touch their own darkness. 

“The trio. You mean…” 

“Yeah.” 

The trio. The three rookie officers who found out about illegal shit going on in the police. Things that Catra had already figured, but needed proof of. They were three idiot kids who were in fear of their life, but they were good at finding things out and snooping. Catra felt like she was so close to bringing down the corrupt cops for good. 

“Insane. Really. Cops on the take from criminals. I mean, what is the world turning into?” 

Catra frowned at her. “Are you joking or stupid? Cops have always been bad, Scorpia. They’re usually just better at hiding it.” 

Her partner looked away out the other window and Catra knew that she had gone a little too far. Scorpia usually thought that Catra was the epitome of good, but sometimes she proved to Scorpia that she was a douche. Scorpia usually tried to not believe it. 

“Do you think Entrapta has hacked into the police database yet?” 

Catra smirked and answered, “There’s nothing Entrapta can’t hack into. At this point, she’s probably hacked the NSA so many times that it bores her.” 

Scorpia nodded and Catra could see that Scorpia was still hurt. Part of Catra cared and thought about apologizing for being so harsh, but she knew by now to ignore that part of herself. She didn’t like that part of her. The vulnerable side of her. 

“That’s good.” 

“Yeah,” Catra agreed softly, not knowing what else to say. “It is.” 

* * *

The alarm that woke Adora up was an old Paramore song that she was addicted to years ago. She never changed it (and she didn’t think she ever would). She rubbed her eyes that didn’t feel like got a minute of sleep. She didn’t know why she still woke up more tired than when she went to sleep. She shook the dark thought out of her head. It was a new day. A day to really make the change she wanted to see in the world. The lack of sleep made it feel worth it. 

Steaming water from the shower covered her body and she enjoyed the sensation. After long nights, she usually woke up aching. The water always helped. 

“Adora!” 

_ Glimmer.  _ Adora pulled the curtain back slightly to see her best friend in a cute dress in her bathroom. Glimmer really had no definition of ‘personal space’ and sometimes it  _ really  _ showed. 

“What, Glimmer?” She thought that maybe the growl that came out of her mouth would scare her away, but it didn’t. Of course it didn’t. It never did. 

“I was just thinking… are you going to go on another date with Huntara?” 

Adora was about to hit something, or more specifically,  _ someone.  _ Glimmer had always been invasive about her love life (or lack of love life), but it got worse after Adora admitted that she didn’t do relationships. She regretted revealing that information and  _ really  _ regretted drunkenly admitting that she had sex with someone from the office. 

“Glimmer, do we have to talk about this now?” 

She shrugged dramatically and said, “I think she’s great, you know? But she flirts with  _ everyone,  _ Adora. And I know she’s hot and all but--” 

_ “Glimmer.”  _ Adora tried to hold herself back and remember that Glimmer wasn’t trying to offend her or anything like that. “Huntara and I aren’t dating. We slept together once after we had a lot to drink. It’s not a big deal.” 

“Not a big deal? Adora, I thought you liked her?!” 

Glimmer was a romantic. Adora knew this about her best friend (just like she knew Bow was the same way). She made up her mind a long time ago that she wasn’t made to be with anybody. That her focus was going to be on work, on making the world better, but Glimmer did not accept that. Adora appreciated that her friend thought she deserved more, but she knew better. She knew not to go down that road. Besides, she rarely had any sort of feelings for anybody. She just didn’t work that way. 

“I  _ do  _ like Huntara. She’s amazing. Seriously. But I don’t have fee lings for her and I do not want to date her. Or date anyone. You know that.” 

Glimmer just grumbled loudly. “Fine. I still think that you should let me try to set you up with somebody. You know, Perfuma thinks you’re great. And she’s  _ single.”  _

Adora knew why she emphasized the last word. The last person she tried to set Adora up with was Mermista, who already was in a relationship with Sea Hawk, even though she pretended to hate him. Besides, as much as she liked the professional deadpan investigator of the firm, there wasn’t anything between them that resembled a spark. Not that Adora had much experience with that feeling anyway. 

“No more set ups, Glim.” She turned the water off and pulled the towel off the hook before getting out. “I don’t want to be in a relationship with anyone.” 

Glimmer pouted. “Okay, but what if there’s someone really hot and--” 

“Glimmer.” 

“Okay, you’re right. I’m done meddling. I’m going to see if Bow’s done with breakfast. And don’t worry, he’s made a pot of coffee. You’re addicted.” 

Adora rolled her eyes and smiled at her best friend, who she knew always meant well. “So are you. Now get out of here.” 

* * *

“Don’t get angry, Catra. I’m sure that there’s a perfect explanation for why--” 

“They are little fuckers,” Catra seethed as she slammed her hands on the table, ignoring Scorpia’s looks of concern. “Of course they gave up. I can’t believe I put any faith in literal children.” 

Scorpia was staring at her, her short bleached white/grey hair swooping along her forehead, and Catra knew what was coming. The optimistic speech about giving people a chance, yadda yadda yadda, people might surprise you, yadda yadda yadda. Catra didn’t know how the woman was still an optimist; she knew how much shit she had been through. 

“Exactly, Wild Cat. They’re  _ children.  _ Give them some space. They’ll come back. They’re good kids.” 

Catra knew what it was like. The police were really an indoctrinating boys club founded on morals they only took seriously when it fit their own ideology, but it was well cloaked by the idea of justice. Catra was once fooled, too, many years ago. But she never got to the point of being a rookie cop. She never even graduated from the police academy. She had seen the truth and never looked back. 

She turned her attention away from Scorpia and the memories of her past back to Entrapta. With her hacker, she still felt like she could get things done without the idiot kids. Entrapta was in the corner of their cramped office space typing away on her several different screens. 

Entrapta was weird. She was brilliant, but weird. Catra still didn’t understand why the woman with long purple hair in pigtails who occasionally wore a bug mask continued to work for her. Entrapta could do anything, but here she was.

“Yo, Entrapta. Please tell me you did not stay here all night.” 

She looked up with wide eyes and declared, "I couldn't say that unless you want me to lie. Do you want me to lie?" 

Catra rolled her eyes but felt the tug of a smile on her lips. “You need help, Entrapta. So, did you get in or what?” 

Entrapta grinned at her like the cheshire cat. “Oh, I got in all right. I got in after ten minutes. Honestly, if they don’t want us to hack in, why make it so easy? It’s like they  _ want  _ us to hack in. I mean, I could delete every file if I wanted to. Or I could put out a BOLO for the captain, Catra. I could--” 

“Yeah, yeah, I get it, brainy. You could do a whole shit load of bad. As much as I appreciate that, do you think we could get the case records?” 

Entrapta just blinked at her. “I could have done that in third grade. But to warn you, they just started to use digital records. I’m guessing most of the records are still in paper files somewhere. Imagine the chaos if someone were to burn--” 

“You terrify me, Entrapta.” She said it in a joking tone, but there was something about the genius that was a little intense. She knew that if Entrapta wanted to destroy anyone she could. She did not want to get on her bad side. 

The hacker just shrugged and continued to type rapidly, off doing her own thing. Catra didn’t even want to ask what she had been up to the entire night if it had taken her ten minutes to hack into the database.

* * *

Angella was walking toward the three of them and Adora felt the air knock out of her. Angella was not just the mother of her best friend, she was the managing partner of the Bright Moon law firm and Adora’s boss. She was beyond intimidating and all she wanted to do was prove herself. Adora wanted to become a partner before she turned thirty (just like all the other associates). 

“I have a new case for the three of you. Follow me to my office. We have a lot to discuss.” She swiftly turned around and expected Adora, Glimmer, and Bow to follow her. 

Adora shared a worried look between her best friends. They already had so much on their plate, they couldn’t imagine handling another case. But it wasn’t like they could tell the woman that. There was no way that she’d let them become partners if they couldn’t handle what they had already. 

The three of them sat down in Angella’s large office with floor to ceiling windows that made Adora feel uncomfortable. The elegant woman just looked at them and sighed. 

“I wouldn’t normally ask associates to work on a case like the one I’m giving you, but our partners have already too much on their hands. I want all three of you on this one. This case is important to me and I trust all three of you to handle it.” 

“Mom--I mean--Angella, what’s going on?” Glimmer asked her, sounding a little bit concerned. 

“Our firm has been investigating the PPD for a long time. You all know the corruption that happens there.” The three of them nodded, Adora more slowly than the others. “Three rookie police officers were just arrested for stealing evidence. Drugs.” 

Adora was confused. “Isn’t that a good thing?” 

Angella shook her head. “I think the rookies are innocent, Adora. I got a call from a friend who’s representing them and they say that they were helping a PI agency get dirt on the corruption going on. She thinks that they’re trying to bury the rookies.” 

“A PI agency?” Bow asked, voicing Adora’s exact thoughts. 

Angella nodded. “It seems like a legitimate agency. I’ll give them a call after this meeting. I want you three to meet with the rookies right now if you can. The charges have already been filed so they have probably been booked. We need to make sure that they get bail.” 

“Angella,” Adora whispered, her voice shaking more than she thought it would. “What PI agency is it?” 

The managing partner looked through some papers and said, “Uh, Horde Investigations & Consulting.” 

Adora gripped the arms of her chair and felt the sensation of her whole body getting dunked in a pool of ice water. For a second, she forgot how to breathe. She  _ knew  _ who was running the agency, she didn’t even have to ask. The name rose to her throat and stayed there. Lingering. 

“Adora?” 

Adora cleared her throat and smiled hard at Glimmer. She didn’t want anyone to know about the maelstrom in her mind that surrounded the person she tried to not think about.

“I’m fine. Let’s get to work.” 


	2. but i can't call you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adora and Catra see each other for the first time in ten years. The first flashback.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eek, guys, I am not a lawyer. I did a lot of research, but if any of it is incorrect, I super apologize! Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter! Comment and let me know what you think!

“The phone is ringing.” 

Catra growled, “I know the phone is ringing, Entrapta. I just don’t want to _answer_ the fucking phone right now.” 

Entrapta didn’t flinch at Catra’s cold words as a normal person would. “Sure, that’s great, but they’ve called like four times and I’m trying to concentrate, here.” 

Sometimes she wished that she could scare Entrapta. “Fuck, fine.” She picked up the phone. “What?” 

_“Is this Horde Investigations & Consulting?” _

Catra wanted to say _who else would it be,_ but instead, she said, “yep. How can I help you?” Catra hated this part. She hated having to _talk_ with people (people she would inevitably end up being annoyed with). She was never really good at that. 

_“This is the Bright Moon law firm. We’re representing three clients that say that they were paying you to investigate the Philadelphia Police Department.”_

Catra’s heart dropped into her ass. “What? Are you saying that—” 

_“Kyle Rogers, Lonnie Sanders, and Rogelio Estevez were all arrested late last night. We were wondering if you could meet with us—”_

“Where?” 

_“Our offices would be good. We have three of our best attorneys on the case. We can talk more when you get here.”_

The woman gave her the building’s address and Catra scribbled it down as quickly as she could with her shaking hand. She reassured the woman that she would get there as quickly as she could and hang up. 

“Those fucking kids,” Catra muttered as she got her casefiles together, kicking herself for not doing more for the rookies that were now arrested. 

“What’s wrong, Wild Cat?” 

Catra turned to look at Scorpia and tried to not lash out on the woman who wasn’t pissing her off. She took a deep breath and explained through gritted teeth, “the rookies were arrested. You know that fancy law firm known for getting people out of the joint? Bright Moon or whatever?” 

Scorpia raised her eyebrows. “I do! If they’re on the case with us, that must be a good sign, right?” 

Catra shrugged (she had no faith in a place run by rich people) and mumbled, “I don’t know. We have a meeting with them. Let’s hit it, Scorp.” 

* * *

“Glimmer! Bow! Adora!” Netossa was running toward them in the parking lot of the PPD precinct where the three rookie officers were arrested and booked. “They’ve already sent them to see a judge. I’m fucking livid. I’ve barely been able to see the evidence against them. We got to get to the courthouse _now.”_

“How are things moving so fast?” Bow asked her as they all ran to Netossa’s car. 

“You know the police,” Netossa fumed when they all got into the car. “They can do whatever the fuck they want when they want to. Jesus. They’re going to a judge who, of course, used to be a prosecutor. I swear to God, this fucking city.” 

Adora shook her head and clenched her fists. It was Friday. Usually, the accused would have to wait in prison until Monday for arraignment. But apparently not for this case. Adora looked out the window as they passed the old building where she had once planned to spend her entire life. It reminded her of—no. She wasn’t going to go there. She did not want to even think about her. She kept telling herself that she was wrong, that the PI agency had nothing to do with her. She did not want to be distracted. She returned to the casefiles that Netossa had passed her and Bow in the back of the car. 

“The rookies did good,” Netossa explained as quickly as she could as she drove. “They didn’t say a word until I got there. After ten minutes with them, I knew they weren’t guilty. You know who arrested them?” 

Adora had a guess. “Weaver?” 

“Yep. I’m sorry you guys were dragged into this, but I need you. I’ve got a million cases I’m working on right now.” 

The blonde nodded, very much aware of how busy Netossa was as a public defender (being overworked and underpaid). She had met her a long time ago through Spinnerella, her wife, who was a partner at Bright Moon at one of those office parties. She admired Netossa for her brains and general badassery. 

Adora felt her heart race when the four of them entered the courtroom. She hated how she would be seeing her clients for the first time in court. There was so much that she wished she could have discussed with them before this. At the very least, she wished she could have reassured them and told them to breathe. 

The three lawyers introduced themselves to the three defendants before the judge entered the courtroom and told them all to rise. Adora looked around for the prosecution and felt her anger rise at the sight of the district attorney. She hated him and his team of corrupt shit tickets. The judge read the criminal charges out loud as Adora watched the smug faces of DA Prime and his team. The charges were extravagant and way worse than what Adora had expected. Theft. Drug possession. Drug distribution. The defendants were looking at hard prison time. Worse than that, since they were cops, they might not make a day in prison. 

After the judge explained to the defendants that they had a right to counsel, Adora stood up and announced that they were pleading not guilty for the three defendants. Adora held her breath. The next part was the hardest. They hadn’t discussed a bail amount after the three were booked, so it would have to be set now and Adora didn’t have much hope. Most judges that were previously prosecutors were not usually gracious. 

The judge set the bail for each of the rookies at $60,000 each. Adora wigged out. If it was any other first-time offender, it’d be closer to $37,000. 

“Your honor,” Adora exclaimed as she stood up, more than frustrated at the injustice that was taking place. She saw this happen all the time in her work. If a judge had a prejudice against the defendants, the bail would be much higher. It rarely had to do with the severity of the crime. She had seen white murderers have a smaller bail. “My defendants have never been charged with anything—” 

The judge held up his hand to silence her (Adora was used to men doing that to her). “They’re law enforcement. They should have known better. The bail is set.” 

Adora turned to the defendants and told them before they were taken away that the firm would pay the bail bond and get them out as quickly as possible. The rookies looked too stunned to understand her words and she couldn’t blame them. She tried to reassure them that they were going to be fine, but it probably didn’t do much good. They still had to be dragged off in cuffs before they could get them back. 

* * *

Catra didn’t fit in. It was the most obvious fucking thing in the world. All the white and windows made her skin crawl. Even the receptionist looked at her and Scorpia up and down and winced a little when Catra barked at her that she was here for a meeting. She was mid-sentence when they were approached by a very tall woman in a long flowery dress. She definitely wouldn’t have expected to see her in this kind of building. 

“Hi!” The woman greeted perkily. “You must be from Horde Investigations & Consulting. I’m Perfuma, I’m one of the partners here, but I’m not working on the case. Angella Bright Moon told me to come get you. This building is like a maze.” 

Catra didn’t like her. She didn’t like the woman’s kindness or smile or anything about her, really. Scorpia, on the other hand, was looking at the woman like she was some bright light. She snorted. When Scorpia fell, she fell hard and quickly. 

“I’m Scorpia,” she greeted and shook hands with the woman, their eyes lingering on each other. “This is Catra, she’s the boss, but she’s not very talkative. This place is amazing!” 

Perfuma giggled and thanked her as she led them into the elevator. “I started the initiative to get the place greener. I might be a defense attorney, but I’m a botanist at heart. Do you have a favorite flower?” 

“Hmmm, that’s a toughie. I’d have to say orc—” 

“Enough with the flower talk. What’s happening with the case?” 

Perfuma frowned at Catra’s harsh tone. “Oh, sorry. I’m not quite sure what’s happening. I got a text from Bow, though. Apparently they’ll be here any minute. We can wait in here!” She opened the door to a large office space with a long table and more than five whiteboards. If Catra knew any better, she’d think she was in Hell. 

“Oh, wow, this place is so cool. And ignore Catra. She does not understand politeness.” 

Catra just shrugged at that statement. She didn’t give a shit about what the plant lady thought of her. She didn’t give a shit about what anyone thought of her. 

“How long have you been a private investigator?” Perfuma asked Scorpia as they sat down next to each other and started to ask questions about their lives. 

Catra just sat back and tried to pretend their conversation was white noise. She was good at that, she always had been. She liked keeping a good distance away from people. It was always better that way. She could faintly hear the sound of the door opening and people greeting each other, but she kept her eyes closed. 

“Catra?” 

The voice almost sent Catra flying out of her chair. She opened her eyes and found the person matching the voice in front of her. She blinked, trying to wake up from this nightmare, but as much as she blinked, the blonde didn’t go away. She hadn’t seen her in ten years, but somehow, she looked just the same. Older, but the same. The same blonde hair and stupid poof, the same blue eyes, the same doofy face. She was wearing a suit, not her usual athletic clothes like before, but somehow this fit her better. She looked…

“Hey, Adora.”

* * *

_“Are you putting on a show for us?”_

_Adora stopped the push-ups and looked up at five men, years older than her, smirking. She felt her body tense as she got up. She was used to the looks and comments, but she didn’t know how to get them to stop. Usually, she just brushed it off and walked away, but it wasn’t working. They were just getting worse._

_“I wouldn’t put on a show for any of you.” She grabbed her bag and tried to walk out of the gym but one of the guys stood in front of her._

_“Where do you think you’re going, baby? We were only just getting started.”_

_Adora felt the group of men circle around her and she felt her heart beat rapidly. She could fight off one of them, or maybe a few of them, but all five?_

_“Yo, rapists, you might want to back away or I will report every single one of you.” The voice was deep, surly. The men backed away and Adora could see who it belonged to. Another cadet, one of the few other women in her class. She was just as young as Adora, but she was not a team player._

_“We weren’t—”_

_“You weren’t going to what?” She asked as she approached closer and closer. “You weren’t going to touch her without her consent? Get away from her before I scream ‘fire’, assholes.”_

_The guys ran away and Adora didn’t know what to say. She was glad they were gone, but she did not like how someone felt the need to save her. She always prided herself on how she was able to take care of herself, no matter what. She liked to save people, not the other way around._

_“What?” The stranger asked, smiling at her like she knew a secret. “No thank you? ‘Thanks for saving my life, Catra’. Oh, no problem, Princess. It was no trouble at all.”_

_Adora rolled her eyes. “I could take care of myself, thanks. I don’t need a knight in shining armor.”_

_“Oh, yeah. Right. Of course you could take on five men. That fucking makes sense, idiot.”_

_A small smile grew from Adora’s lips. Her name was Catra. And for some reason, despite every instinct and warning bell going off in her head, she didn’t hate her._

* * *

Adora almost fainted. If anyone asked (God, she hoped nobody noticed), she would blame it on her lack of sleep. She knew she shouldn’t have been so caught off-guard. She knew deep down that when she heard of the PI agency, she knew it was Catra. But knowing she could be seeing _her_ and then seeing _her_ was two different things. And hearing her voice, hearing her say _that,_ it sent her over the edge. 

“You two know each other?” 

She knew that Glimmer had said something, that Glimmer and Bow were probably staring at her, but she couldn’t get her eyes off of her. Off of Catra. Off of the girl wearing a leather jacket, a band t-shirt, and ripped black jeans. Off of the girl who now had short hair instead of the long hair that would frizz and force her to wear a beanie if they were going out. 

“You don’t know?” Catra was _smirking_ at her for christ sakes with a raised eyebrow and _fuck._ “Me and Adora go way back. Isn’t that right, Princess?” She tilted her head, taunting her. It was all so… _Catra._

She tore her attention away from her and turned to her best friends that were staring at her like she had three heads. “Bow, Glimmer, this is Catra. We were…” _Best friends. Partners. Something more._

“Roommates,” Catra finished as she sat back down, slumping in the chair. “We were cadets for the department we’re investigating. I’m honestly a little hurt that you didn’t tell them, Adora.” 

Adora refused to look at her again. Refused to give her the satisfaction that she was _still_ angry, even after a decade. She didn’t really want to look at her friends, either, at how hurt they looked at the fact that she had hidden Catra from them. But looking at her pissed best friends was a lot easier than looking at her past… something. 

“Well then. I’ll leave you all to it. It was really nice to meet you, Scorpia.” Perfuma smiled at the stranger and gave the three of them an encouraging nod on her way out. 

“Hi, I’m Scorpia,” the stranger introduced herself with an uncomfortable grin. “I’m working for Catra and I’m really excited to be working with all of you. So, where are the kiddos?” 

Adora sat down at the table and tried to keep her attention on Catra’s annoyingly beautiful partner instead of Catra (who was still gorgeous). Bow and Glimmer had followed her and sat down as well. She just wanted them to be able to work through this. She considered the possibility that she could win this case without having to deal with her past whatever if she just concentrated on the case hard enough. 

“We posted bail for them, but it’ll take a few hours for us to be able to pick them up,” Adora explained and started to pull out her case files. “The charges against them are… intense and we won’t know much about the evidence that they have on them until a discovery day, but hopefully they were idiots when arresting them and disclosed more than they should have.” 

“I’m sorry,” Glimmer began as she looked between Adora and Catra, “I’ll ignore the fact that Adora and Catra have this weird energy, but I’m confused. Were they paying you to look into the PPD or were you paying them?” 

Catra let out a stiff laugh. “It’s complicated, Sparkles. Let’s call the relationship… mutually beneficial.” 

Glimmer did not accept that. “But you were investigating the PPD, right?” 

Adora could feel Catra’s eyes all over her. “She’s cute, Adora. Stubborn. Are you going to look at me or will I have to talk to a wall all day?” 

Adora snapped her head to look at her and she felt her heart thump in her chest. “Just be straight with us, Catra.” 

“Oh, sweetheart. You know me. I’ve never been _straight.”_

_Fuck._

“Catra—” 

“Adora.” 

Her knuckles turned white as she attempted to crush the arms of her chair. She hated this. She hated Catra for how she left and she hated Catra now for acting like nothing happened between them. For acting like she never left and hurt her. 

“Okay…” Bow shouted and cleared his throat. “Obviously there’s a past between you two, but can we please ignore it until we beat this case? Look, I think we have the same goal here. To get the defendants out of prison and to prove the corruption in the PPD. So can we please work together civilly?” 

Catra grinned devilishly and muttered, “I don’t know. Can you work with little ole me, Adora?” 

Adora crossed her arms and looked away from her. It was so much easier when she wasn’t looking at her. “Stop messing around, Catra. You tell us what you know and I’ll tell you what we know. Bow’s right. There are three rookies looking at hard time. And I bet you wouldn’t be surprised to find out who arrested them.” 

Catra snorted and shook her head. “Fuck, Princess. Shadow Weaver?” 

_“Shadow Weaver?”_ Scorpia and Glimmer asked at the same time with the same amount of confusion. 

“It was a nickname we made up,” Adora tried to explain. “Lieutenant Weaver. I’m not quite sure when we came up with it but—” 

“She was a bitch. She worked us to the bone every day and nothing was ever good enough for her. And she was especially a bitch to me and Adora since we—” 

Adora stared at Catra, wishing she’d finish that sentence. She wanted to know what Catra thought they were because Adora had no idea. Especially since it was Catra who left. Catra who… but it was Catra who was looking down, now. 

Bow coughed and Adora noticed that everyone looked uncomfortable. She bit her tongue and shook her head. She had no idea how she was going to get through this case with Catra around. With Catra and her bad attitude and stupid smile and annoying voice and perfect bo—shit. Adora groaned. She was completely fucked.


	3. i know you think that i erased you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Catra and Adora get a lil intense.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy this chapter! Let me know with a comment about what you think! 
> 
> The flashbacks are in italics!

_ Catra didn’t like people and usually, she made sure that everyone knew it. School counselors blamed it on the fact that she had no family. Catra blamed it on the fact that people had always let her down. People always left.  _

_ Going to the police academy was a decision she made because she had seen a lot growing up and knew the difference between a bad cop and a good cop. She wanted to be a good cop and do good for the people who needed it the most.  _

_ She wasn’t worried about the academy. She was tough and smart and more competitive than anyone she had met. Except for maybe blondie. Stupid blondie..  _

_ She didn’t like her. She was athletic, charming, and equally competitive. She reminded her of a dumb jock a little bit. Tall, blonde, blue eyes. She was perfect. Catra wanted to punch her. Punch her in her perfect face.  _

_ Keeping her from being attacked by a bunch of dicks was a one time thing. She’d do that for anyone. Probably. But it was the blonde’s reaction that was most surprising. She genuinely seemed a little offended that someone was trying to save her. Christ, Catra was the same way (and she thought she was the only one). But still, she didn’t want to like her.  _

_ Adora probably had it all. She probably grew up with money and parents and love and affection. Or at least, she seemed like she did. Catra hated her. Hated her stupid pretty face. Fuck.  _

* * *

Catra knew deep down that messing with Adora was probably not the right thing to do. But she was Adora. Adora, who she hadn’t seen in ten years. Adora, who she tried not to think about for all those ten years. Adora, the only person that Catra had ever let in. 

“Okay...” the guy who had a pocket square with decorative arrows on it said as he anxiously looked back and forth between Catra and Adora. “I think that we should all start from the beginning.” 

The other girl wearing the sparkly (barf in Catra’s mouth) dress nodded. “Our firm has been investigating the PPD for a long time. Angella Bright Moon, one of the managing partners, has always believed that there’s corruption going on. Which is why we were interested in this case.” 

The two of them just stared at Catra, waiting for her to tell them why she was so invested in the PPD and the three rookies. She just stared back. She wasn’t comfortable telling a bunch of suits about how she worked. Besides, Adora probably knew why she couldn’t let go of her experience with the PPD as a cadet. 

“Catra?” Adora asked, sou nding a little more than frustrated. The tone of her voice almost made Catra smile, forgetting that it had been a decade since she had last heard it. A decade ago, she would have pushed her even more, bothered her harder until Adora gave in. 

“Adora.” 

She groaned at her and pleaded, “Come on, Catra. We all want the same thing.” 

“You sure about that, Princess? You’re a rich law firm. How am I supposed to trust anything you say?” 

Catra watched as Adora became red, fury bubbling up inside of her. A decade later, she still liked to watch Adora get mad (though she hated how Adora’s anger was still sickeningly beautiful to her) and try to diffuse her own emotions.

“You know me, Catra. You  _ know  _ me.” Adora’s blue eyes were staring into hers like daggers and for a second, Catra froze and was caught off guard. It was almost as if Adora cared about her and thought that Catra cared about her, despite the years that had passed. Despite how it all ended.

Catra shook her own vulnerabilities out of her mind. “I  _ used  _ to know you, Adora. I knew you when you were eighteen. You’re a suit, now. You’re the exact kind of person that we made fun of ten years ago.” 

Adora looked ready to argue with her, but the door opened and the plant lady came back in. She opened her mouth and then closed it, as if she had been stopped by all the tension in the room. She glanced around the room, looking a little upset before Sparkles asked her why she was here. 

“The defendants are ready to be picked up.” 

Before Catra could argue that she and Scorpia should pick them up since the trio knew them well, the sparkly girl said, “Bow and I can pick them up. Scorpia, you should join us.  _ They _ need to get through… whatever… they need to get through.” 

Catra watched as Adora tried to beg her friends with her eyes for them to stay, but they refused and left. She wasn’t surprised that the blonde didn’t want to spend any time with her alone. Catra didn’t want to spend any time with her either. It was bad enough being in the same room with her. Being in the same room with her alone sounded like a worst nightmare scenario. 

“You look like you’d prefer to be in a room with an axe murderer,” Catra stated bluntly when they were the last two people in the room. 

Adora stared at her with those blue eyes of hers and frowned. “You don’t make this any easier.” 

Catra smirked at her, unable to help herself. “Why would I want to make this easier?” 

“You’re unbearable.” 

“I always have been, Princess, you know that. But, fine. You’re right. Me and you, let’s not make it personal.” 

Adora’s eyebrows just furrowed deeper like she was trying to control her emotions even harder. “What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you mad at me? You’re the one who  _ left,  _ Catra.” 

Catra snorted and shook her head (and tried to shake away the look that Adora was giving her). She couldn’t believe that Adora would ask her that as if she had no clue. She left because she had to and she didn’t feel like she had to explain herself. 

“Let’s not, Adora. Let’s not drag it all back up, okay?” 

Adora let out an exasperated sigh. “Whatever, Catra. Whatever.” 

* * *

She could deal with the silence. Adora didn’t like being in the same room as Catra, but if they didn’t talk, if Adora pretended like she wasn’t there like an apparition from her past, she felt okay. Catra’s sudden presence startled her. That was true. But the job was important to her. Getting the kids out of prison and catching the actual corrupt cops was something she needed to do. If she had to ignore Catra’s total existence, she could do that. She  _ had  _ to do that. 

Because Catra had left ten years ago and the pain still lingered. 

“Adora, Catra.” She swiftly turned around to find Bow, Glimmer, and Catra’s partner (God, was she tall and muscular and kind of Adora’s type) standing at the door. “The rookies are getting something to eat in the break room. Adora, can Bow and I talk to you for a second?” 

Adora’s stomach dropped. She knew what this was. Glimmer had her ‘mom’ face on and Bow looked incredibly uncomfortable (between friends, he was very non-confrontational) and slightly constipated. Knowing there was no way out, she reluctantly got up and followed to a small closet close by. 

Before she could say anything, Glimmer pushed her up against the wall and wagged her finger at back and forth at her, shouting, “did you know before we met with them that we were going to have to work with an ex of yours?!” 

Bow looked as terrified as Adora felt at Glimmer’s tone. 

“Well, she’s not an ex.” 

Glimmer put her hands on her hips. “She’s not an ex? Do you think I’m oblivious, Adora? The second you saw her you looked like you wanted to kiss and hit her all at once.” 

“Glimmer, I don’t think we should assume--” Bow stopped once he received one of Glimmer’s classic glares. Adora mouthed ‘sorry’ at him before Glimmer returned her attention back to her. 

Adora gulped, feeling the heat rise to her cheeks and stay there. She didn’t know what to do. She and Catra never dated, but they were… something. Roommates. Best friends. And she didn’t know how to explain that to her current best friends. Especially since she had never brought Catra up before. 

“She’s not my ex, we had an apartment together while we were in the academy, but yeah. By the name of the agency I thought it could be her. Horde was the group home she lived in—” 

“What the hell happened between you two, Adora?” 

She just shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m serious, I don’t know. She just moved out one day. I don’t know what I did.” Glimmer gave her a look of disbelief. “You’re giving me the ‘oh, Adora, you dumb lesbian jock’ look, Glim, but I’m being honest with you. I didn’t  _ do  _ anything.” 

Glimmer just stared at her before she sighed, all the anger leaving her body. “Okay. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to interrogate you.” 

“Yes, you do,” Adora said and let out a soft laugh, hoping to lighten the mood. “That’s what makes you such a good lawyer. You almost made Bow pee his pants and you weren’t even interrogating him.” 

Bow gasped, “no I did not!” 

Adora grinned at him. “But you have to admit, you’re a little turned on.” 

His eyes widened as he looked between Adora and Glimmer, who was raising her eyebrows, obviously looking for an answer. Adora was usually very oblivious to romantic relationships, but she had caught her two best friends making out in a different closet in the building. It definitely startled Adora at first, but after spending a few days thinking about it, she realized that she had been missing a  _ lot  _ of signals between them. Now she was just glad she could use something against them. 

“I will not admit to anything. Can we get back to our jobs now?” 

Adora sighed glumly and put her arm around Glimmer’s shoulders. “I don’t know about him, Glimmer, but  _ I  _ was definitely turned on. You can be very scary sometimes.” 

That made Glimmer smile proudly. “Thank you, Adora. I try.” 

“You both are terrible influences on me.” 

Bow tried really hard to frown, but once Adora put her other arm around her other best friend, he couldn’t help but smile. None of them could stay mad at each other for very long. 

* * *

Adora could immediately tell that they already assumed that something was wrong. That what Huntara had to tell her was sending her over the edge. They kept looking at her like they were waiting for her to break down in front of them. She hated it. She hated that they looked so concerned and worried when she could take care of herself. When she could put her work first, always. 

She could put her thoughts about Yates on hold for the job. She didn’t have to think about his death. She didn’t have to think about the fact that she was working on his case and that he had so little faith in her and gaining his freedom that he decided to get his freedom a different way. 

Adora could focus on  _ this  _ case. She could focus on the defendants as they told their story. She could focus on Bow making a timeline on the whiteboards. She could focus on Glimmer coming up with a list of potential evidence they could use against the PPD and evidence they could use to prove the defendants’ innocence. She could focus on the case as she interrogated the defendants about their time in the PPD. 

Catra kept butting in at random times, trying to back the defendants up or trying to clear something up for them. Every time, Adora sent her glares, but the brooding private investigator didn’t seem to care. She was annoyed by Catra’s presence. By the fact that she seemed to know better than anyone else about the corruption that took place in the PPD. 

Hours dragged on. Adora learned that the defendants weren’t very forthcoming and were not completely on the same page. Rogelio barely said anything, Lonnie was defensive, and Kyle was completely terrified all the time. Getting anything out of them was seeming to be impossible. 

“Adora!” Catra shouted as the blonde pleaded with the defendants to start telling them exactly what they had been doing in the seventy-two hours before they got arrested. “They’re not criminals! Stop fucking treating them like they are!” 

Before Adora could fire back at her, Glimmer exclaimed, “why don’t we finish for the night! It’s late and the defendants should get some rest. They’ve had a hard day. We can get you all cabs.” 

Adora looked around to find that everyone was relieved. It startled her. She thought that everyone would want to work as long as they could. She thought…

Catra, Scorpia, and the defendants ran out of the room as quickly as they could, leaving her with just Bow and Glimmer, who were just staring at her. 

“Shit. Was I being--” 

“A jerk?” Glimmer finished, looking a little exasperated. “Yes.” 

“It’s okay, Adora,” Bow told her sympathetically. He just scooted closer to her but kept a safe distance away. Bow was always good at boundaries when Adora needed them. “What did Huntara tell you?”

Adora glanced away. She didn’t want to see them and their reactions. She didn’t want the comfort that she knew they’d offer. They always did. 

“Yates… he committed suicide.” 

“Oh. Adora…” 

Bow and Glimmer wrapped their arms around her. When she first met and befriended them, she was caught off-guard by how touchy they were. She was used to it, now, though it still sometimes made her feel smothered. She knew they just wanted to make her feel better and she loved them for it. So she let them hold her. 

“Let’s go home, Adora,” Glimmer suggested warmly as she and Bow pulled her up. “We can pick up food on our way home and watch something. You need to get your mind off… everything.” 

She didn’t tell them that all she wanted to do was be alone. She didn’t tell them that she didn’t think she deserved their company. She didn’t tell them that it was probably all her fault. She didn’t tell them that she should have seen the signs. She didn’t tell them that she didn’t do a good enough job with Yates. She didn’t tell them that she wasn’t good enough. 


	4. you may hate me, but i can't hate you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh, the tension continues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy this chapter! please leave a comment and let me know what you think!

_ Adora knew that she probably shouldn’t have been watching Catra like a total creep and that she should have just gone over to talk to her. Out of all the other trainees, Catra was as close to the top as Adora. With the blonde’s competitive streak, she should have despised her. They were two of the only females of the group and she was just as young. It was hard for Adora to prove herself when someone was just like her. She couldn’t really stand out.  _

_ Catra was tough. She might not have been tall and muscled like Adora, but she was fast (faster than everyone in the class) and flexible. She also had quite the bad attitude. Weaver, their class trainer, obviously hated her. She gave her the worst punishments and tried her hardest to catch her off-guard with questions and facts they were forced to memorize.  _

_ She was mean. Mean to everyone (including Adora), but for some crazy reason, she didn’t really mind. Catra was the one who helped her when a bunch of guys were messing with her. She knew that there must have been some good in her. Even if it was deep, deep down.  _

_ After a workout, Catra approached her and Adora’s heart skipped. Catra swung the towel around her sweaty neck and asked her, “see something you like?”  _

_ Adora had to admit, she was a little flustered. But she wouldn’t let Catra know that. She might have had a reputation, but so did Adora.  _

_ “I don’t know, do I?”  _

_ Catra grinned and sat down next to her. “I have figured you out, Grayskull. You’re not very complicated.”  _

_ Adora tried her hardest not to be offended. “Never said I was. So, who am I?”  _

_ Catra raised an eyebrow, obviously surprised by her reaction. “You’re better than everyone and you know it. You like that. You’re strong, you’re smart, you’re perfect. You want people to like you. Hell, you want me to like you. You’re a suck up. You’re mommy and daddy’s little girl. Daddy’s little ang—”  _

_ Adora felt cold at the mention of her parents and Catra realized how quickly she turned pale and stopped talking. The blonde got up and said, “ding ding ding, you’re a winner, Catra,” before she started to walk away, leaving the brunette watching her go.  _

* * *

Adora’s body felt like it was moving through thick sludge. She barely slept and barely ate. Glimmer and Bow did what they could, but they couldn’t force her to sleep. She stared at the wall and hoped that she could think about anything else besides Yates. 

At one point in the night, Glimmer had come into the room with water, saltines, and hugs. Adora let Glimmer hug her and ate some of the saltines just so that she didn’t get accused of hurting herself. Glimmer asked if she wanted to talk about it, but Adora clamped up. Bow came in minutes later and tried to rescue them with funny stories. Adora loved her friends, but she knew they were sacrificing their own sleep for her and tried to push them out the door. 

But they stayed. They brought in blankets and pillows and slept on the floor next to her, knowing she was weird about sleeping in the same bed as people who were not… 

She loved them. She loved Bow and Glimmer. Even if they snored the entire night while she didn’t get any sleep. 

“I look terrible,” Adora muttered when she came out of the bathroom in the morning looking so untidy compared to most days. 

“Here,” Bow said and rushed over to her, fixing her suit so that she didn’t look like she was a drunk who slept in her old clothes. “Better. Here’s coffee. I made cinnamon rolls.” 

A small smile formed its way onto her face. “Thanks, Bow. How did you have time for this?” 

He shrugged and answered, “I just do. But we should head out. Glimmer’s just getting ready. How do you feel?” 

“I don’t know,” she confessed quietly, hating that she couldn’t say ‘good’. “I’m fine enough to work. I’ll be better today. I was an ass yesterday--” 

“Everyone understa—” 

“Still.”

Bow just nodded, knowing he wasn’t going to get anywhere with his usual ‘your best is all you can do’ speech. He just reached out and pulled her into yet another hug. Adora knew if he wasn’t such a good lawyer, he would have been a good therapist. 

“Adora! Bow!” Glimmer greeted as she came out of her bedroom (that she mostly shared with Bow, now, though they kept trying to hide it) wearing a jumper that made Bow glue his eyes to her. “I just got a text from my mom. She wants to have a meeting with us right away.” 

“I’ll drive,” Bow announced and stared at Adora, trying to make his point clear. He didn’t want her to drive separately so that she could work longer than them. She nodded, message received. 

Angella wasn’t the only one in her office when they got there. Her husband, Glimmer’s dad, and the other managing partner (who was the public face of the law firm) was also there, looking genuinely concerned. 

Angella, looking as dignified as usual in her flowing and regal dress, asked, “How’s the case going? Netossa told me that the defendants were terrified. How are they handling it now?” 

“They’re handling it like most people would,” Glimmer told her mother and kept eying her silent father who was just walking around. “Dad?” 

Micah smiled warmly at his daughter, but there was still worry in his eyes and wrinkles. “Hi, baby girl. Your mother and I are… concerned. Is this case too much for the three of you? I want you all to be honest with me.” 

Glimmer shared a look with Adora and Bow and they all had the same expression. “We can handle this, Dad. Besides, no one has the experience with PPD like Adora does. We  _ got  _ this.” 

Micah turned to look at Adora and nodded. Everyone was very aware of Adora’s background with the PPD. It was what almost didn’t get her hired after law school. It was what made people suspicious at her in the beginning. It was Glimmer and Bow who took a chance on the ‘PPD girl’ first. 

“I know you do. But don’t be afraid to ask anyone for help. Alright?” 

The three of them nodded, glad they weren’t benched, and exited the room feeling a little relieved. They met up with the defendants in the lobby, who all looked a little worse for wear, before heading back to the office, hoping today would be very different than the last.

* * *

Catra’s small loft barely fit her, but she liked it that way. It was cheap, easy to clean, and just like the kind of rooms she grew up in. The only time she hadn’t lived in a place like this was when she lived with Adora. Adora, who made her find personal things to put up on the walls. Adora who made sure that she ate and slept, just as Catra did for her. For ten years she had successfully forgotten about Adora, but she couldn’t stop thinking about her now. 

Adora was a defense attorney. It was so  _ Adora.  _ Always having to be the savior. Catra admired that about her and hated it. It annoyed the shit out of her, anyway. Adora was always one to put everyone ahead of her. 

She could barely sleep with her on the mind. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw Adora’s face, Adora’s body, Adora’s suit. She heard Adora’s voice, her yell, her laugh. It was driving her absolutely crazy. 

Catra thought about inviting some girl over so that she could be distracted from all things Adora, but even that felt wrong. Because she knew that deep down, she would still think about Adora even if she was with someone else. 

And when she finally did sleep, of course she dreamt about Adora. Except they were eighteen again and they were in their old place. They were eating pizza on the floor and discussing all the different shitheads they had met in the academy. When Catra woke up, she had tears in her eyes and wanted to beat herself up. 

But at least she wasn’t the only one who obviously didn’t get any sleep. When Scorpia and her entered the office again, she got to see Adora, who still looked pale and sick and beyond tired. She looked way worse than how Catra felt. At first, it pleased her. She was glad she was feeling as much agony as she was. But Adora’s dickishness from the previous day was gone. She just looked like an empty shell. 

It made her remember the times that Adora got like that when they were living together and Catra never knew what triggered it. All she knew was that it took a while for the blonde to get out of it. 

Like she lost control of her body, Catra found a seat next to her and Adora looked genuinely shocked that she sat next to her. It almost made Catra laugh, but she knew it wasn’t very funny. 

“You okay, Princess?” Catra wanted to sound serious, but it still came out a little accusatory and sharp. 

“M’fine. I just wanted to say,” she turned to the trio, who looked just as sleep deprived as Catra, “I’m sorry about yesterday. I was harsh on you three when I shouldn’t have been. I’m on your team. We’re one team. All of us.” She turned to look at Catra, and begrudgingly, she nodded. 

“It’s cool, Grayskull,” Lonnie responded with a nonchalant shrug. “We’re all stressed.” 

“Lonnie’s right,” Arrow Boy said and stood up to return to his precious white boards. “We are all beyond stressed. We don’t want to make you feel like you were in the wrong in any way. We just want to know what happened, that’s all.” 

Adora nodded and added, “we’re not just against Weaver, the corrupt cops, or the PPD. We’re against the DA and possibly the judge. We’re not sure how far the corruption goes, so we need to be precise about this. And very choosy with who we reveal information to.” 

Catra listened to her carefully (ignoring how she felt when being in such close proximity) and suggested, “well, why don’t we make this a social media campaign?” Almost everyone said ‘what’ and stared at her like she was crazy. “If we can’t trust the system, then we trust the people. Young people already know how fucked up the courts and justice system are. If we provide the public with facts—”

“We could get public support,” Adora finished, looking at her with awe. “You’re right. The DA and maybe even the judge will just want to cover this up. They’ll probably even offer you with plea deals that are pretty good. They’ll do all they can to make sure this doesn’t go public. They wanted to make sure the corruption didn’t get out so they pinned it on you three, but they did the opposite of what they meant to. They made it possible for us to expose them. They’ve made a  _ terrible  _ mistake.” 

Catra felt fired up by Adora’s words. “We have a hacker in our agency who can help us with that aspect. Entrapta’s a wiz. She could do anything we wanted with social media.” 

Adora grinned at her, like genuinely smiled at her, and turned to the rest of the group, who all looked more alive than they had in the last day. Catra knew what the difference was. There was hope. 

* * *

As everyone moved around to look at Bow’s whiteboard, Adora noticed Catra lean over to whisper to her. “Audiobooks, Adora.” 

Adora stared at her blankly. It wasn’t just the fact that Catra was speaking to her softly that startled her, it was the content of the words.  _ Catra remembered.  _ She realized that somehow Catra must have remembered how shitty her sleeping was. And how sometimes audiobooks could settle her down. Adora had completely forgotten. 

“Oh,” she breathed out, not knowing how to reply to that. “Yeah, thank you. I should try that again.” 

Catra shrugged like it was no big deal. “Whatever.” 

Adora didn’t care that Catra acted like it was nothing. She knew what it still meant. That she still cared, after all these years. That maybe Catra didn’t completely hate her like she thought. It did make her question why she left, though. Adora always figured that she did something wrong and Catra just became tired of her. 

“I think we need to start at the beginning. And when I mean the beginning, I think we should start with Catra and Adora. When did you two first realize something was wrong?” He wrote down ‘2010’ and then stared back at them. 

Adora could see her ex-roommate tense up and instinctually, she began to move closer to her before she stopped herself. She cursed herself in her head. Ten years had passed. Ten years had passed  _ and  _ Catra probably hated her in some way. She knew that she couldn’t offer her comfort. 

“I dunno about Adora, here, but it took me more than a few weeks to realize that something was off. But she might have had a different reaction.” Catra turned to look at her and Adora with a raised eyebrow, like she was expecting her to argue with her. 

But she didn’t. “Oh, I had no idea. I mean, it wasn’t like I had been to other police academies. I guess I should have realized that it was weird that Weaver, our instructor, was also a lieutenant. I had no idea that was strange at the time. I was pretty oblivious to a lot of it.” 

“Weaver was probably the biggest red flag,” Catra muttered, agreeing with her. “She was… well, let’s just say she had her favorites that she wanted to groom and I was not one of them. But Adora…” 

That felt like a jab. No, Adora decided that was definitely a jab. Adora tried to not get angry and fire back at her old friend, but she could barely control her emotions around Catra. That had always been their problem ten years ago. They couldn’t control themselves around each other. 

“Weaver wanted to mentor me,” Adora confessed, trying to simmer everything she was feeling. “And she was abusive toward Catra. I think I started to realize something was wrong when Weaver started to tell me to stop hanging around Catra. She kept trying to convince me that Catra was just holding me back. And that’s when I knew… but there were other signs.” 

Catra was staring at her. Adora couldn’t tell if she was angry or hurt or felt something else. She never told her about what Weaver had tried to convince her to do. She figured that Catra knew that’s what she was doing, but she never told her. She never told her that Weaver told her to leave Catra and she didn’t. That she refused. 

Eventually, Catra’s eyes flickered back to Bow and she explained, “the environment was a disaster. They trained less about protocol and more about maintaining loyalty. I guess I really started to realize something was wrong when they favored egomaniac narcissists over empathetic do-gooders. They favored anyone who would put the PPD over everything else. And then, of course, near the end, there was your dad, Adora.” 

Adora flinched. She noticed that both Bow and Glimmer had dropped their jaws a little. Adora had always told them she didn’t have a family. That wasn’t really a lie. 

“Your dad?” Glimmer asked her, looking a bit hurt.

Adora chewed her cheek and drew blood. “My  _ foster  _ dad visited me near the end. He was a retired cop for a different police department in a rural area. He… alluded to the corruption he heard of in the PPD. Nothing specific, really. But that’s when I dropped out.” That was a lie. But she couldn’t tell them the truth. She wouldn’t. 

“Can we talk to him?” Glimmer asked her with obvious hope in her eyes. 

_ Never.  _ “No, he’s dead.” 

She kept her eyes on Glimmer but could sense Catra shift in the chair next to her. Catra was always good at reading her. She hoped that she didn’t notice she was lying. Glimmer and Bow couldn’t tell she was lying. They were looking at her with sadness and pity. 

“But you don’t have any specific evidence and you didn’t see anything specific that would prove any corruption?” Bow asked Adora and Catra. 

“They’re fucking careful,” Catra explained, offended that Bow asked that. “No, we didn’t see anything specifically. It was a feeling, you know? But I always kept my ears out for it. Eventually, I started to hear other stories. But nothing concrete. Nothing that would  _ prove  _ it in court.” 

Adora had nothing to add to that and Bow nodded, a little bummed. “That’s fine, we have time to find proof. Okay, let’s fast forward ten years. Lonnie, Kyle, Rogelio, tell us your story.”

* * *

Catra didn’t know how to respond to the news of Adora’s dad’s death. She didn’t like him (in fact, she hated him), but he was Adora’s foster dad. Catra knew that Adora wanted to become a cop because of him. Catra knew his opinion mattered to her. But it wasn’t like she could tell Adora she was sorry for her loss, even if she was. She wanted to say a lot to Adora, though she knew she couldn’t. Wouldn’t. 

“The three of us met in the academy,” Lonnie began to explain, pulling Catra out of her thoughts about Adora (God, she hadn’t stopped thinking about Adora since she saw her again). “We were treated like the three weakest links. We realized that if we worked together and helped each other, we might get better. It worked.” 

“I think they thought we were unassuming,” Kyle added as he hung his head low, as meek as ever. “I m-mean, at least me. No one took me seriously. But people said things around me.” 

“We didn’t take Kyle seriously when he told us,” Lonnie snorted and patted her friend’s shoulder. “That is, until the shooting of the bar owner. They made us sign NDAs so that we couldn’t talk to the media. That was at least my first warning sign. After that, Rogelio and I started to take Kyle’s claims more seriously.”

Kyle nodded vigorously. “I never heard of anything concrete. Just people joking around about some of the things they could get away with.” 

“And  _ then,  _ they put us on evidence duty. Rookies usually do. We would log things in and out. It was the most boring job ever until we started looking at logs before us. Evidence went missing all the time. DNA evidence, weapons, drugs. I’m not sure if they’re protecting criminals or they’re protecting themselves, but we knew something was up.” 

Catra knew this story already, but this time, she was able to watch Adora react to the story. She seemed engulfed in it, letting every word soak into her pale skin. Catra used to love watching her work or study because she made this little face when she was concentrating. Sometimes Adora would even bite her tongue if her concentration was really intense. It always made Catra smile. 

Bow hummed. “So maybe we could get the eviden—”

“I think they have probably fixed it by now,” Lonnie finally confessed like Catra knew she would have to. She looked down at the table, avoiding the eyes of her confused lawyers. “The three of us, it was so dumb, we thought that we could fix things. We went to go see our Lieutenant.” 

_ “Weaver,”  _ Adora breathed out, the anger suffocated in her voice. 

Lonnie nodded. “We had no idea she was a part of it! If we knew—”

“You tried to do the right thing,” Adora reassured her with a small smile (that kind of encouragement was something Catra was not capable of). “Don’t be mad at yourself. So, what happened then?” 

Lonnie looked up at Adora and told her, “Weaver yelled at us. She said we weren’t being loyal to our superiors, our colleagues. That we had to trust our own department and that if we couldn’t do that, that we should quit. It was a disaster.” 

“But it made us realize that the corruption went all the way up to her,” Kyle pointed out with a sigh. “Which made us terrified enough to want to find a private investigator that wasn’t connected to the PPD.” 

“They came to me,” Catra stated firmly, “and I knew that we had a chance to bring the PPD if we got enough evidence. But here we are.” 

Arrow Boy put the cap on his marker and turned to look at the timeline he made. Bow had covered two different white boards with information and Catra had to admit, she was a little impressed by how much he was able to put on there. 

“So we know that Weaver’s a part of the corruption.” He moved to another whiteboard and wrote at the top ‘suspects’ and turned to the rest of the team. “Do we have any other guesses about who could be involved?” 

“I think we have to assume to some degree that this at least goes as far as the district attorney,” Adora asserted and looked toward her friends for support. “DA Prime is prosecuting this case. Either he’s an idiot and will do whatever Weaver says, which is possible, or—”

“Or he’s involved,” Catra finished and shivered slightly. “Which would mean that he’s been deciding whether or not to prosecute cases out of his own selfishness and corruption. So the prisons could be filled with innocent people  _ or  _ he’s not prosecuting cases of the guilty cops. Or both.” 

“Either way, he’s a beast in court,” Sparkles cautioned, looking like she had seen a ghost. “He’s been around forever. Getting enough proof to prove that he’s dirty… we’ll need a lot. Much more than circumstantial evidence or witnesses. We need video or a confession or something else huge. And if we do it wrong, it could seriously backfire.” 

Catra wasn’t scared of some asshole like the district attorney. “So we go at this like it’s a gang or cult or whatever.” 

Adora turned to look at her with confusion written all over her face. At first, Catra thought Adora might make fun of her or laugh at her, but instead, she just asked, “what do you mean?” 

Catra shrugged. “If we’re right, this is an organization. Not just one or two people. If people are joking about it, then it must be somewhat well known, not very secretive. They don’t have to keep secrets if they’ve installed loyalty in the group. So we start at the bottom and work our way up. Maybe turn a few people if we can. Get enough evidence and confessions from the people at the bottom so that the people at the top’s only option is to confess.” 

Adora was just staring at her again. She didn’t know what the staring meant. If she thought Catra was crazy or stupid or— 

But then Adora’s stare turned into a grin as she blurted, “that’s brilliant, Catra!”

“I agree!” Sparkles shouted excitedly. “Better yet, I have an idea on where we can start. You five can’t be the only ones who have noticed something freaky is going on with the PPD. And if they have tried to silence you three, maybe they’ve done it to others. Ruining them in some way. If we can get more people to talk, it’ll—”

“Create a shit storm of talk, of people coming forward,” Catra interrupted, feeling a fire in her bones that she hadn’t felt in a long time. Like she was doing something meaningful, real. “This might actually work.” 

“We can start doing research on the officers in the PPD in the last few decades,” Arrow Boy announced with conviction. “Maybe even start looking at cases—”

“Our hacker,” Catra interrupted, “she’s gotten into the PPD database—”

“Oh my God, I’m not hearing that, right now!” He shouted, placing his hands over his ears. 

Catra glared at him and explained, “what I  _ mean  _ is that she could come up with a list of cases that fit our certain scenarios. We could then start to interview people that would fit our description.” 

“That would be great, Catra,” Sparkles told her with the first genuine smile she had actually given her. “We can get started on our research as you all do that. Should we reconvene tomorrow with what we’ve learned?” 

They all nodded in agreement. For the first time in a while, Catra felt confident that they’d actually uncover all the shit that was going on in the PPD all these years. 


	5. and i won't replace you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Catra and Adora deal with their lingering feelings in very different ways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Please leave a comment and let me know what you think! 
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING: at the end of the chapter there's a brief mention of sexual assault.

_ Catra shouldn’t have cared that she offended the blonde priss. She’s offended every person she’s ever met and has never given a shit about it. She didn’t know why things were so different with this rando chick. Everything about her was annoying. Catra didn’t even like her. So she didn’t know why she was running after her like a fucking idiot.  _

_ “Yo, wait,” Catra hollered as she chased the stupid blonde after pissing her off. Once she turned around to face her, she said, “I hit a nerve. I tend to do that.”  _

_ Adora squinted at her. “Good for you?”  _

_ Catra facepalmed. She hated this. She never apologized. That was a rule she made for herself. She never wanted to apologize to anyone.  _

_ “No, I just mean… fuck.”  _

_ Adora rolled her eyes. “Impressive, really. I’m floored by your words, Catra. Bye, now.”  _

_ Catra groaned and grabbed the blonde’s arm before she could walk away. “Why are you like this?”  _

_ Adora pulled her arm away from her and stepped back. “Why am  _ I  _ like this? Who the hell asks that kind of thing?”  _

_ Catra gulped and blurted the first thing that came to her mind. “I heard you talking to Yaz about needing a roommate. I’m interested. In being your roommate.”  _

_ “You’re joking.” Adora was staring at her like she was an idiot.  _

_ Catra felt like an idiot. She had a shitty apartment, but she wasn’t looking to move. But she didn’t feel like she could turn back now.  _

_ “Nope,” Catra laughed awkwardly. “I shouldn’t have been an ass to you. But I’m serious about the apartment. Unless you already found a roommate.”  _

_ She looked torn (like she didn’t know whether to lie and turn her down or not). “I thought you didn’t like me. Why do you want to live with me?”  _

_ Catra shrugged. “I don’t like you. But I dislike you less than everyone else around here. So why the hell not?”  _

_ Adora just continued to stare and then finally sighed, “you better be the best goddamn roommate or you’re out, buddy.”  _

_ Catra couldn’t help but grin at that.  _ “Buddy,  _ huh? Ooh, scary.”  _

_ “You’re on thin fucking ice.” Adora started to walk away and then turned around. “You coming, loser?”  _

_ For some reason, Catra couldn’t stop grinning. She figured her mouth had to be broken. It was the only thing that made sense.  _

* * *

Adora buried herself with cases. They started with cases that they had already flagged for possible cases they could win appeals that had to do with PPD. A lot of cases had to do with possible misconduct in the investigation or trial. Adora made a list of every cop, prosecutor, and judge involved, making piles of cases based on different categories: forced confession, poor jury decision (the jury made a conviction based on circumstantial evidence), careless investigation, or set-up against the defendant (through planting false evidence, false witnesses, etc). 

Bow and Glimmer were using her different categories to try to flag witnesses that could aid them in their search for corruption. They were chatting together, enjoying each other’s company in a way that Adora couldn’t at the moment. Usually, she joined in with them and their antics to lessen whatever stress was going on, but she couldn’t in this case. Having Catra around brought up too much. She just wanted to stuff it all back inside and forget all the shit she had been attempting to forget for years. 

Work was easy to drown in. Adora was always good at drowning herself as deep as she could get into the things she cared about to forget everything else. 

“Adora?” 

Bow’s soft voice pulled her out of the water. Adora looked up at him and had to blink a few times to see her friends clearly. Once she finally could see them, she could read the concern all over their faces. 

“Yeah?” 

“Adora, it’s getting late,” he whispered as they started to gather their things, “and you didn’t eat any of your dinner.” 

Adora stared at the sandwich that Glimmer had grabbed a few hours ago. She had completely forgotten about it. She completely forgot the fact that when she went into machine mode that she forgot how to ‘human’ as well. 

“Oh. Whoops.”

Glimmer walked over and crouched down so that she could get close to her. “You need to eat, Adora. You can’t forget about your own wellbeing for the sake of a case, okay?” 

Adora grumbled in response. Bow and Glimmer were the first people who told her to prioritize herself. They taught her about self-care and self-love. Adora still didn’t understand it. She didn’t  _ get  _ it. She was doing the kind of work that could save lives and create justice. She knew she didn’t matter in the whole grand scheme of things. 

“A lot is going on right now,” Bow agreed with a sympathetic head nod. “With the case, with the reemergence of Catra in your life, with Yates’ death, with talk about your… dad. I know there’s a lot going on. But you can’t close yourself off.” 

Adora didn’t like this. This kind of intervention. 

“We can spend the night watching your favorite show and getting your mind off of things!” Glimmer suggested with a tight smile. “Please, Adora. If not for you, do it for us. We need to make sure you’re okay.” 

Adora groaned, but nodded. She’d do it for them. She’d do anything for them. 

* * *

She should have expected this. Catra knew that, but it still put her through the wringer. Finding Entrapta in the office with a desktop literally taken apart into little bits was a little terrifying. She had known the hacker for a few years, but the woman still seemed to surprise her. 

“Entrapta?” 

The woman with purple hair finally looked up at her, obviously not hearing her and Scorpia come in, and frowned. “This looks bad, doesn’t it?” 

Catra shared an exasperated look with Scorpia. “Uh, yeah. We brought back some food but—” 

“Ooh, is it tiny?” She rubbed her hands together and grinned. 

“Aw, I’m sorry, Entr--” Scorpia began to tell her before Catra interrupted her. 

“Entrapta? I can’t just order the food to be tiny. Nobody else in the entire world likes tiny food.” 

Entrapta tilted her head at her like she was a confused puppy. “Mini cupcakes. Mini muffins. Mini pies. Baby carrots. Baby—” 

“We get it, Genius,” Catra snapped at her and threw the bag of fast food to Entrapta. “We have work for you if you’re interested.” 

The tech wizard looked up at Catra with wide, excited eyes. “Ooh, work? What kind of work?” 

Catra smirked. “We were wondering if you could do a little search for cases in the PPD database that follows a few guidelines we’re looking at.” 

Those words seemed to make her that much more jittery. She reached for a laptop that wasn’t torn to bits and asked, “what kind of guidelines?” 

“We’re looking at cases where the PPD screwed people over. Specifically other officers. Either where they were arrested for a crime, were suspended, or fired.” 

Entrapta started typing furiously before she turned to look at Catra, narrowing her eyes at her. “Are you positively sure there aren’t any more guidelines? There have been a lot of people fired and suspended over the years and—” 

“Right,” Catra agreed, a little frustrated with herself for not making it clearer. “We’re looking at cases where they were arrested, suspended, or fired for something they didn’t do.” 

The woman with purple hair just blinked at her. “So, you want me to do more than a little search.” 

Catra ran her fingers through her short brown hair, trying to control her anger. “Yes, Entrapta. It’s a little more than just a search.” 

“We can help you out,” Scorpia told Entrapta, looking a little on edge. “I don’t think Wild Cat was expecting you to do all of this on your own.” 

Catra glared at her partner. Of course she wanted Entrapta to do all of it on her own. Catra was never good at research or anything like that. That shit was mindless. Catra preferred adrenaline rushes. 

“No, no!” Entrapta shouted as she started typing even more rapidly. “I’ve got it! Using you two would just slow me down.” 

Catra shrugged and started eating, fine with waiting for Entrapta until she was done. Scorpia sat down with her on the floor and picked at her food, looking slightly uncomfortable in a very un-Scorpia way. 

“I feel like I’m going to regret asking this, but what’s wrong?” 

Scorpia, looking genuinely surprised that Catra asked, just shook her head. “Don’t worry your pretty head about it, Wild Cat. I’m A-OK.” 

“Great,” Catra muttered, not convinced but not wanting to get too personal.

“But since you asked, something is sort of bothering me.” Catra rolled her eyes. “Did this Weaver character ever hurt or threaten you? You and Adora seemed pretty bothered by her. Are you okay, Catra?” 

Catra sighed, regretting ever asking. She should have known better. She should have realized that Scorpia wasn’t feeling bad about something going on in her own life, but about something in Catra’s life. It was so typical of her. She didn’t want to talk about herself and the last thing she ever wanted to do was talk about her life ten years ago. 

“I’m fine, Scorpia,” she grunted and focused on her food (away from Scorpia’s prying eyes). “Weaver was a bitch to everyone.” 

Catra could imagine that Scorpia had puppy dog eyes. “What a terrible woman. I’m so sorry that you had to deal with that. You and Adora. You know, I’m starting to like Adora. She’s very passionate about her work. I can see why you were friends with her.” 

Catra wasn’t good at reading people, but she could hear the underlying sadness in her voice and finally looked at her to see the frown at the edges of her lips. She knew how hard Scorpia tried to be friends with her, tried to make her open up. Scorpia misread the situation completely. 

“We’re not friends anymore. We were never really friends.” It wasn’t a lie. She couldn’t really explain what she and Adora were, but she wouldn’t explain it as friendship. “Seriously, Scorp.”

Scorpia’s frown turned into a smile. “Well, she wishes she could be your friend, Wild Cat. She looks so sad. Oh, I want to hug her, but I think that’d be inappropriate. I hope someone is hugging her right now. Do you think she’s getting hugged?” 

Catra didn’t want to think about how Adora was feeling. She grumbled, “I’m sure she’s fine.” 

“I don’t think so,” Scorpia mused and shook her head. “I think she’s hurting. Haven’t you seen the circles under her eyes? I don’t think she sleeps.” 

She noticed. Of course Catra noticed the dark circles under Adora’s eyes. Of course she noticed the pale tint to her skin. Of course she noticed the way her hands shook when no one was looking. Of course she noticed the way Adora scratched at her thighs and couldn’t stop. She always noticed everything about Adora, even if she didn’t wanted to. Even if it stung and burned her in ways she couldn’t describe. 

* * *

Glimmer and Bow wanted to wrap her up in a burrito of blankets and pillows. They called it the ‘burrito of love’ and for a minute, a very minuscule minute, Adora wanted it. But that was the problem.  _ Wanting.  _ When she forgot about who she was, who she was raised to be, she let herself want things. She let herself be selfish. 

“Adoraaaa!” Glimmer shouted as she tried to wiggle out of the blanket. “Let us make you feel better!” 

“I’ve got snacks!” Bow announced as he brought several bowls and bags into the living room. “And plenty of marshmallows for—Adora! Why are you trying to break free?!” 

The truth was because she didn’t deserve it. But she knew how they would react if she told them that. She knew they’d freak out and make it into a big deal and try to spend the night convincing her that she was deserving of their attention and warmth. 

“She’s denying our love, Bow!” Glimmer pouted playfully at her (sort of) boyfriend. “Can you believe this?” 

Bow chuckled and said, “knowing her, I can, actually. We just need to hug her tighter. Force her to accept our love.” 

Adora stopped grimacing as Bow and Glimmer wrapped their arms tightly around her, refusing to let her go. She liked their hugs, their embrace. They made her feel good about herself. Despite all of her instincts telling her to push them away, she accepted their presence. She didn’t let herself enjoy it, but she didn’t push them away. 

“Thank you,” she whispered to them, feeling so vulnerable and weak. 

“Of course!” Bow told her with a contagious smile. “You never have to thank us. You know me and Glim. We’ll do anything to have a sleepover. Even if your favorite show is kinda scary.” 

Adora snorted. Bow was scared of a lot of things. Which was sort of ironic since he defended convicted killers and other criminals. Then again, the way he leaned into Glimmer’s warmth made her wonder if part of it was for show just so he could get closer to his (sort of) girlfriend. Because Adora didn’t understand why  _ anyone  _ would be genuinely scared of Wynonna Earp. 

She tried her hardest to keep her attention on the show and her friends who were constantly feeding her marshmallows and ice cream and poptarts. Wynonna Earp might be her favorite show of all time, but it wasn’t enough to drag her mind away from Yates. From Weaver. From Catra. 

Adora kept a smile on her face and laughed at the right times. When Bow and Glimmer were paying attention to each other, she could easily fool them. She could easily pretend like she was fine. She  _ was  _ fine. At least in her own definition of ‘fine’. If she was still breathing she was fine. 

When Bow and Glimmer fell asleep, Adora slowly and carefully moved out of the burrito and traveled to her bedroom. She started digging under her bed for the box she had at one point considered burning. She didn’t know why she was pulling it out. She didn’t know why she opened the box. She didn’t know why she pulled out the picture. 

She looked so young. Eighteen and carefree. She was laughing at Catra’s glare. She used to take pictures of the two of them much to Catra’s chagrin. There were other pictures. Other pictures of Adora and Catra and the short time they had together. It was only a few months but Adora remembers it being the happiest time of her life.

That period of her life was over. Long over. A decade over. She berated herself for not being over it. For still being pissed that Catra left. 

She didn’t know she was crying until she noticed the note she was holding was wet. It was a stupid drawing. Catra drew a dumb fucking sketch of them as a joke and Adora kept it. Adora kept everything that had to do with Catra. 

Adora wiped her tears away angrily and threw everything back into the box and shut it. Instead of trying to sleep like she knew she should, she pulled out her files on Yates. 

Yates was a dad. A  _ good  _ dad. A good dad who killed his child’s rapist. When Adora took the case, he seemed genuinely shocked that someone believed him. Believed in him. Yates was worried. About bringing the case to the news again. He didn’t want her kids to have to suffer. 

_ Yates was a dead dad.  _

Adora was shaking. She couldn’t save him. She couldn’t save him. She couldn’t save him. 


End file.
